As I write this there is only seven days left to my little experiment that I somehow new would not make any money. http://igg.me/at/restart/x yet I think that it could at this moment there is someone out there that may just read this and say hey why not. This is a dream but it could become reality. I have not pushed as much as I needed to get this funded but it is something that I truly believe that can change my life for the better. So if you are reading this and there is time left for you to donate than please head over to http://igg.me/at/restart/x and just add $1 to support me and my new outlook on life. I am truly begging you now help me help myself live a life.
If you could find it in your soul to aid me I thank you and I will prove you you that it was not a waist. I will dedicate my life to something other than self destruction.
I sit here mind going to that dark place once more thinking about how the world would be better of without me and I truly believe it. As it is now I have nothing to offer nothing to share but I want to find that spark that joy that is life. I think of what could be and and hope that some day soon I can say that I have lived. Today is not that day, this day I am in a mood of hopelessness and disrepair
It is not that easy fro me to convey how my mind works or why I would like to not be alive, there is just something in me that is broken, lost and would love to fix it yet I do nothing but waste away. IF only I could see myself as more than a waste, something that is living and not a waste.
I do hope and dream. I want more than what I have as does every other person that is out there but I do not go out and do what is needed. I need help and I do receive some but I need more. Medication and therapy only do so much what is left is up to me and I am the one who sees myself as this waist so how in the world am I going to find value in something I despise.
I seek a life worth living and I will do more to achieve it but I need someone who has no reason to say “You are worth it” Without it I am just an empty shell void of any determination to do what must be done.
I did not want to but I will still post this and hope that someone would give me feedback on it
Finding value in ones self is not an easy thing to do. I for one do not know my true worth, I am lost in this world. Searching, waiting for something to find me, something that is never going to just come to me and say hey I am what you seek. Yet I wait I do not move and life passes me by. I try to find things that make me think that push me further than where I am and move but not as fast as I want. I want more I want a life and I want to live it.
I have plans and thoughts, dreams ambitions and many things that can be done with effort. Yet I have not motivation to do any of it. I can become more if I just pushed harder and overcame the weakness that is within me. To rise up and grab hold of something that is solid something that is moving. I can not do this alone I can not do this without a helping hand.
Asking For your Help!
I would like who ever is reading this to go and check out and read it and if you can give me your feedback if you can not donate.